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Sunday, October 31, 2010

a date to remember

It’s already 3AM here in the Philippines. Updating my blog even nothing seems come to my mind right at this very moment.
Saturday (October 30)…
It was such a busy day for the whole family. We were on the go preparing for mom’s birthday celebration and blessing bash for our newly opened water refilling station. Even neighbors and friends joined and helped us in the preparation of foods. I can’t narrate much about the foods but one thing is for sure, everyone got full.
God continues showering us with blessings. What I ask Him is that He may continue guiding us and with His mighty hands, we may not depart from the right path and that the blessings He just bestowed upon us would be utilized in glorifying Him.
Oops!!! I almost forgot what really made me blissful and blessed this day. I don’t know if it was a luck or what but I like to say that I have been granted a wish to be with the whole family made this date worth-remembering. For the first time in my 20 years of existence befell this momentous treasured memory.
Another one that made my night mirthful though partly somber,
My sisters invited their boyfriends in the celebration. This Vinnie guy, my sis Rhae’s boy, jokingly told me, “Kawawa naman si Pen oh! Walang pair.” Guess what my response was! Being far from my man who’s in abroad, but still loyal to my second boyfriend, it makes no sense to fool around. Well, I jokingly said but seriously said that they’ll meet my man when we will have our marriage vows. Ha-ha!

Friday, October 29, 2010

momentous day

I just made an effort to get here at the computer shop in order to update my blog though I have nothing much to say. I actually wanted to make an update last Wednesday while I was teaching my sister-in-law on how to use messenger but my friends followed me here at the net café and invited me to jam with them.
Last Tuesday, I went to Bayombong and enrolled for the second semester. I was touched when I met up with my friends/classmates along the covered walk and each of them gave me a not-so-big hug. They were happy to see me and it was such a fortunate moment for me.
Even before school year 2010-2011 began, I had wished to be in the block A class for the second semester and I just honestly found a way to get in. and I made it! My classmates showed their support and I wanna thank them for believing that I can do far better than what I had shown them during the first semester. They even gave me sermons as one of them said, “Next sem ate, wala ng jamming jamming. Magbasa-basa ka na lang.” They may be younger than I for them to reprimand me like a kid but I appreciate their support and trust in what I can do.
As of now, I am just hopped-up for the start of real challenge. And I just want to share that we are preparing for a celebration for my mom’s birthday. For the first time, neighbors will see our family complete—the Ginez family, created by Mr. Federico Ginez and Mrs. Leonida Bacani, with their nine fruits. I will try to blog about it.:)

Monday, October 25, 2010


Last week, I was just so problematic and down—yes, so down and depressed—for I thought I would be asked to leave school again. Oh! Not again. I hate the life I had left. I hated the life of bystander and I will never be one anymore. That's a promise.
Well, I feel so great and blessed and prized and prioritized right now. My brother arrived home from Cavite yesterday. We had serious discussion together with our two other siblings. Then he said his decision. I will continue my studies but my sister have to leave hers. I could feel my sister's bitter acceptance of our brother's decision but somehow, it'd pass just like what I had felt three years ago—I even cried out loud (Good thing is that it's not yet the final choice, maybe he will change his mind). You know the feeling of being prioritized? I feel it. And I love this feeling. Being one of the priorities for now is like an achievement because it means something; it means that I am noticed for my desire to finish a degree.
I want to share what happened a week before final examination in our first semester. Well, it was two weeks before the exam, Ma'am Padre, our English 1a instructor, chose me to join English competition together with three other classmates. It was surprising for me since the subject is one of my weaknesses and lucky I was. I participated in the reading comprehension field. It was the first elimination round and I must say that it was easy as pie but I really don't want to expect that I passed it (we are not yet informed of the result). This fortunate day was a perfect day for me to reflect on my doings and assumed its negative views that I couldn't see or I failed to see rather. In taking my studies during the first semester, I had this thought that real challenge had not yet began and this real challenge I refer to is the accounting subject we had to struggle for to pass it. This very thought urged me to take my studies too easily. It's like the competition I joined. Games, contests, competitions or whatever you want to name it, begin in easy mode, followed by medium and the final round is the difficult mode. Having it realized is helpful on its very own ways to make me transform in any way. I must thank GOD for this.
Easy mode in my chosen endeavor was the first semester. But I think I would possibly fail myself for the slight negligence I spared for my studies. Failing in the easiest mode would be an obstruction for me to continually battling in my race. That was it! It was an invalid guiding principle to push on my pursuit. I am just so fortunate to somehow pass my grades. I should be better next semester where "real challenge" will begin.
Tomorrow, I'll be going to Bayombong to enroll myself.

Sunday, October 17, 2010

capital "B" for bathoom..:)

It was just last Friday that I felt so happy, blessed and it really was a mirthful moment with my few classmates. We celebrated for something not-so-special. We enjoyed each other's company and made a memorable bonding that had made our first semester worth remembering.
A thought occurred to me, "tomorrow or the day after it might come a crestfallen experience." Then really here I am. This doomed feeling had started yesterday and I couldn't help but cry my heart out to lighten up my encumbered spirit. Being in a shoestring is practically a challenge, most especially because it is so new to me.
A Filipino belief as goes, "saya ngayon, bukas makalawa problema naman" for it has been clearly observed by many, though scientists would definitely do not give an effort to study about, I really believe in it. But why is so this happens? Well, like in spiritual beliefs, it cannot be scientifically studied.
Really was so down and depressed just a while back. Throwing my pillows there, messing up the whole room and fixed it up after a few minutes—my coping mechanism when cheerless moments like this come. I vividly call to mind what all I wanted to do—to go very far as I could possibly do—to escape a problem. I would say that I was thinking of doing rebellious deed. I really am easily gets blue and instead of assuming great moves to get over such circumstances, I often almost kill myself with such devilish imaginations that I would faultily identify as the "answer". It's so bad of me to think of.
BUT, just an observation in me, when times like this come, taking a shower or being inside the bathroom rather, would be a perfect means for me to find a solution to get out of despair. I was just so unflinchingly visualizing of going away then decided to have a shower to freshen up myself. Maybe it's really not my habit to wash for almost an hour (sometimes, I exceed an hour), what takes me long inside the room is that I find it (being inside the bathroom) helpful to meditate good moves. Amazing is it! And I really love it. I even got to the point that I compared this instance to a friend. A helping hand of a friend can't be always around, when I badly need someone to confide in and cannot find one, there is my best friend—the bathroom. Nice, isn't it? Best friend is not only applicable to humans, to a favorite pet or thing, mine is a proof that it can be a part of the whole. :)

Friday, October 15, 2010


Final examinations for this semester is finally over. We had just taken our CWTS examination this morning and we are just given time to finish all the requirements in this subject. done doing my PDI here at E-library.
Yesterday was such a fun. After we had checked our test papers in Finance 101, we  agreed to have a jamming. I, together with my other eight classmates went to Solano. Masaya was the perfect word that could describe the experience. The soon-to-be-lovers, Charly and Hazel were the first to get to our meeting place at a catholic church of Solano. I actually planned to give them time for each other (privacy), for them to talk about whatever they have. Then we followed them there. Decided to drop by at a supermarket nearby--Savemore. Lots of tripping, jesting and all of such a crazy stuffs came in our mind. Trying the free taste of new products here and there. I remember calling Romiel, "tatay" the entire night as a part of the joke then he would answer me "anak". Going over the kid's milk section of the supermarket like a mom or dad with their kids choosing a brand of milk, "daddy, eto ang gusto ko." one would exclaim. "Anak, mahal yan. Meron namang gatas si Ate mo, humingi ka na lang sa kanya." (it's green) answered the other.
We spent almost half an hour at the supermarket only to get to an agreement to buy just two bottles of two-liter soft drinks, a pack of chocolate and another bar of chocolate. This pair of soon-to-be-lovers was planning to buy a kilo of chooks-to-go but then came this Mr. Intelihente and guided us along in going to a lomi house and ordered for a bowl of beef lomi for each of us instead. Took funny group pictures. It was such a remarkable bonding indeed. Everyone of us exerted effort to have time for this jamming.
After having a bowl of lomi, we then had to call it a night but nah. Before going back here in bayombong, we tried the kids ride at the children park of solano first. It was so much fun!

Wednesday, October 06, 2010

From a simple discussion

Who would deny his/her excitement for this coming sem-break? Especially for those who are slothful like me? No worry, next week will be our last week for this semester here in school then worries will be over.
We will have our final exams so we should have started hitting the books, go over our notes--review, review and review for us to pass the exam. What do you think will be the result of your class standing? Fair? Good? Excellent? Or are you preparing yourself to hear the worst, "needs improvement"? Will the evaluation go this way? I really have no idea. Well, 'tis actually not what I want to talk about here.
Last Monday, on our Filipino class,I was struck by the simple discussion. The very first days of school, I was so glad to be back in college. I was no doubt so excited in every subject. Excited to meet new friends and new instructors. Sadly, my excitement unexpectedly gone and since then, this very thought that real challenge is not yet here then why would I ever concentrate in my academics? Why would I worry? That's just one of the reasons why I take my studies so easily. What I also had in mind was that, I was so unmotivated due to lack of internal inspiration.
Thanks God, from a simple discussion, it has changed. I was enlightened. Why am I here at SMU? To pursue my chosen endeavor of course. For whom? Simply, not for myself alone but for my family.
From now on, I would gladly take every risk that schooling would give me for my family. Most especially for my mom. She's my most precious inspiration.
My mom had not finished college. Not even elementary but I never ashamed of that. I love her. But you know I never have tried telling her so. Neither have I let her feel how much she means to me.
I wanna thank that remarkable Monday afternoon for it was then that I finally found my way. For my mom, without her, I am not here today. Not a million thanks would do to express my gratification. How can I pay for all her sacrifices? I'll fulfill my aspirations for her. And for a woman who always do me a favor, I don't promise to be a perfect daughter but I guarantee my self-improvement.
Next time, I'll make a post about our mom-daughter relationship.

Conversation with a guy I admire

Yesterday, while we were on our Math class, this classmate I admire sat beside me. After a while, he said, "Hala Ate Pen, ma-mi-miss kita." Then he added, "Agahan mo mag-enroll next sem para magkaklase pa rin tayo." Of course, I agreed with his idea.
He's just naturally sweet. I really admire him fact that, everyone in the class recognizes his intellectuality. "Intelihente" indeed! Well, that's it.
This morning, on our Science class, I sat beside him. I don't know if it was a part of his joke though. He told me, "Ang ganda-ganda mo, ang cute-cute mo, ang liit mo pa." I answered him as if it was a joke. Then he added, "Ang liit mo pa. Para kang barbie na kontrabida." That what exactly made me laugh. He's practically a good joker eh.
After our class; as we were walking along the covered walk, he made a gesture as if he were to hug me then unexpectedly kissed me on my head--so sweet of him. After a while he said, "Parang na-i-infatuate ako sa'yo." I just smiled. "para kasing nakaka-amaze ka tignan." he followed. What would I answer?
I mean nothing in posting this one. It just actually reminded me of someone. It's somewhat I've found "another HIM" in his person. Someone who shows appreciation, you know. Whom I'd throw another appreciation--exchange of appreciation but no more than that.
Honestly, I am so flattered whenever someone says compliments to me. That's only it. Oh, I can't get over huh.
BTW, I have already found my man so please, don't give it a meaning.

Sunday, October 03, 2010


It's still an hour before my afternoon classes start.
As I was on my way here at Apo Pilo, I noticed a group of students all in their proper uniform and they're all neatly-looking. Guess what I am saying? My eyes were looking for someone. I'm so eager to see that someone around but inside these four months of first semester, I have seen him only once. I was the one who asked him to keep distance from me, I asked him not to talk with me anymore, not to send me messages. What's hurting here is that he followed what I really do not want him to do. Then a thought that he doesn't care for me at all formed in my mind. The fact that I asked him a favor but he seemed to ignore my need. Was I wrong in my decision to cut our communication? I really do not know. At one point, it helped me get-over my hang-up he caused.
I'm sorry, I am interrupted by a destructive mammal here. I forgot what I wanted to write here. Hate that DESTRUCTIVE MAMMAL!!!