Disappointed

Nothing significant comes to my mind.

But trying to grasp what the innermost part of my thinking mind says.

I have been in this state for few days.

I so hate this feeling.

I feel like I have done nothing good for my studies and in all aspects of my being.

Last week, our Accounting professor announced the schedule of our first ever minor exam. We had the exam yesterday. Being so confident, I did not review the lessons we had discussed. And being so inattentive during lectures whatsoever, I wasn't acquainted of the contents of the exam. I thought it was pure analysis—value received and value given away, that kind of thing—I ignored the acronyms mentioned in the lectures and even the statements and facts about accounting. Whew!!! Only to discover that those things I ignored were of majority in the test items.

Then this morning, I crossed path with my former classmate who happened to have checked my test paper, he told me that I got 50 something out of 100 items. Ayun! Kinda' disappointing. But I know that it was the result of my performance in this particular circumstance. Nakaka-frustrate!

You know guys, being out of school for three years was a real challenge. Looking at its positive view, it was the time that I realized the need of going to school, the desire to earn a degree to mention some. But you know, now that I am back to being a student, I feel like I am starting again as a K1, and maybe worse, as growing infant who's taught by a mom. I really hate it! Adjustment? Maybe. It's so hard. Sometimes, I even think that I cannot move on to this predicament anymore. That I will be in this state forever—confused and seems illiterate! I wouldn't want to be like this, but neither would I dream of leaving school again.:(

PS: mamaya ulit... may klase pa ako. Sa fourth floor pa.